Dating, rejection and lasting impressions.

Five years ago (almost 6, wow), i went on a date with a man i had met at some event. Physically, he was my type and what i admire in a man--the ever-cliched, talk-dark-handsome. We went out a couple of times and from those dates, i could tell that there was absolutely no chemistry and that we weren't quite compatible. There was something about his sense of humor and his (in)ability to carry on a smooth conversation that seemed to turn me quite off. But other than that, there was nothing wrong with him. I remember him having a pretty good job decent salary and a car--rare at this time.

So the last time we saw each other, i told him i'd had a great time with him (i had) and he was a cool person to hang with (he was) but i didn't think we were compatible or that we necessarily fit and that i wasn't interested in pursuing a romantic relationship any further. And we said our goodbyes/see you laters as he dropped me off at my car. And that was the last we ever spoke. Ever. I tried calling and texting some time after.....nothing.

He completely cut me off--as in, deleted my # and removed me from his FB friend list (LOL i have a whole post on this i will upload later). Now, at the time, i thought he was acting completely childish and i was actually really surprised because i had never been cut off so abruptly like that.

I started thinking about this person because i recently saw a pic of him on FB...one of those Ohh...i know you....kind of things. Physically, nothing has changed--he's still tall, still dark and still handsome. But i got to wondering about the men out there who can't handle rejection and resort to the drastic measures of completely cutting people out. I can't really relate to that because i can count on one hand the number of people i have completely cut out and even then i'd still say hello if/when i saw them in public.

Rejection is a crazy thing. It's a feeling that basically leads you to questioning your worth. In his case, he must've felt "What is so wrong with me that this chick won't give me a chance?". I saw it as childish back then but i totally get it now. It is a hard thing to wrap your head around especially if you are often used to getting the things/people that you want. Rejection in life is hard to take in general but rejection in dating is like another level of pain.

Don't get me wrong, i'm not reminiscing about this situation and wishing i could date this man again or wishing i hadn't turned him away all those years ago. That is not the case at all. When i saw the reminder of him on FB, i wasn't immediately thinking about the fact that we went on a couple of dates, i only remembered the things i didn't like about him and the things i wanted to change back then (and probably still would now). But years later it's good to look back and reevaluate certain things you didnt understand when you were younger.