...

two words keep replaying in my head: unhappiness and tolerate.

I have so many questions to ask. Like what happened? Was it me?
but no matter how many questions i ask, i know i will not get the proper response to them.

Do you know what it means to be unhappy? like really unhappy? Unhappy to me means an alteration of your current mental state to one that is unacceptable. One that is full of negative feelings and emotions. Nobody wants to be unhappy.

Has anyone ever told you that you were directly/indirectly responsible for their unhappiness? that shit is not for the faint of heart. TRUST ME.

i keep replaying the memories in my head, wondering where i took a wrong step or where i voiced the wrong opinion. nothing. it all felt normal. it all felt healthy. felt good…great. disappointed to find out that it was all one sided: my side.

many tears later, i must pick up my shoulders and i must move forward. mom's right. i've been through worse. this too shall pass.